Sore Throat -- Happy Husband

I woke this morning with a sore throat. It hurt to swallow. It hurt to talk. So I pantomimed to my husband my situation. He got a silly grin on his face, and then started doing a jig around the house, singing out loud, "I can talk without being interrupted. I can talk without being interrupted."

Another Punny Tale

As I came rushing into the house, I reached the door handle, but missed it, swinging my arm in front of me as in an "aw-shucks" gesture. I said to my husband, "I missed the door." He replied, "Is that the bull-fighter who didn't show?"

Breakfast Fruit

This morning at breakfast, my hubby commented, "This fruit was picked by a sad dog."
(a melon collie)

Seed Ticks, Anyone?

On one of our honeymoon adventures, my husband and I backpacked into the Ozark Mountains. By that time, we were tired of crowds and people, so had driven an hour or so on a dirt road, off a back road, then parked the car. We followed an old, unkept and unmarked trail into the woods. Our needs were met. No people in sight or sound.

After hiking a few hours, we took a rest on a log at the edge of a meadow which was created by a fire years before. Black stumps were still scattered throughout the field ahead of us. Soon we felt itchy. Looking down, we discovered we were covered with thousands of seed ticks -- itty-bitty-sized ticks common to the Ozarks.

We jumped up, brushed off as many as we could, and realizing they had gotten under our clothing, rushed into the field (away from overhanging trees and rotting logs where ticks tend to hang out). We stripped naked, and using up nearly every match we had, we lit, blew out, then "popped" each of those little babies out of our bodies, also checking each other over well, since we would be sleeping int he same tent that night.

Grand way to get to know your new spouse.

How Much Zucchini is Too Much?

My husband would say one.

Our first year married, I wanted to go all domestic, so thought I'd plant a garden. My grandfather had a garden. We grandkids were never allowed in it. But it was huge -- house-sized huge. So guess how big I wanted my first garden? Yup. Just like my Granddaddy's. But, what to plant? I wasn't really into vegetables, except eating corn, carrots and peas.

I asked farming neighbors in our new community, and was told zucchini was easy to grow. I'm not sure I ever even tasted zucchini before that. I read the instructions on the package, and then proceeded to plant three seeds to every hill until all the seeds were gone. Zucchini grows like magic. No matter how many you pick, the next day all you have to do is lift a leaf to find another.

Not wanting to waste food, I experimented with the stuff. Today, when I even mention the word "zucchini," my husband turns green.

A few years after that first garden, I actually self-published a cookbook called "The Zucchini Cookbook -- 101 recipes, including a 5-course meal with zucchini in each meal; games included." Stupid title, but descriptive. I printed it on green paper, which was rather pukey, looking back on it. I discovered some favorite recipes, but someday will figure out how to cut them back to one-person-sized.

How much zucchini is too much? Maybe, if I ever plant it again, I'll only sow one hill with two seeds.

Someday, a Dog

I've never had one, but there are times when I think I'd like to own a dog. I am an outdoors person, and would take many more hikes were there someone with me to defend against potententially dangerous 4- and 2-legged creatures. My husband has had many negative experiences with dogs, both wild and domestic. Because of that, he told me I could have a dog when he died. His exact words: "Over my dead body!"