Monday, August 30, 2010

Another Funny Road Sign

Humor Blogs

A road sign (actually, a billboard) in Chicago area:

Your wife is hot.
Time to get your AC fixed.

This was an ad for a Four Seasons... I think. We drove past it in Chicago-I-94 traffic.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Lookin' Pretty in the Black Hills

Humor Blogs

When we lived in the Black Hills of South Dakota, we liked riding the forest roads -- dirt road, one-lane roads, don't-see-anyone roads. On one such trip -- a "we've got an hour to kill before a meeting; hey let's drive into the Hills" trip -- we got a flat tire. We're AAA members. No worries, right? Wrong. Outside of the towns, there are only three spots in the Black Hills which have cell phone coverage. We were not in one of the spots.

We guessed correctly where the spare "donut" tire was. The manual let us know the jack was in the glove compartment. My hubby lay on the rocky, dusty ground while I was to read the instructions to him. Only, I didn't have my glasses. I held the manual at arm's length, reading slowly, word by mistaken word. Time's ticking. My husband needed to be back in town for his meeting. He stood up, grabbed the book from my hands, and said, "Just stand there and look pretty."

So I did. I wonder, though: Is looking pretty in the woods when there's no one around, the same concept of "if a tree fell in the woods and there's no one around...?"

Monday, August 23, 2010

August Fairs

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Fairs are fun. People have worked hard all year (or summer) to bring food, produce, animals, art, and entertainment together for this one week.

It was a bit of an adjustment for our family when we moved from Erie County in Western NY, with nearly a million people living in the county, to Western South Dakota, which, when combined with North Dakota, holds about the same number of residents as Erie County.

That first August, friends took our high school son to the 4-State Regional Fair in Rapid City. Prior to this, we'd attended the Erie County Fair near Buffalo, NY, but that was a county fair, not a 4-state regional fair. Our son was thinking eye-popping huge.

When he got to the end of the runway, he looked at his friends and said, "So where's the rest of it?" They turned, and pointed down the other side of the runway.

Yep, there's a difference from urban living and frontier living. I actually appreciate them both.

Where's the rest of the fair? Spread throughout a four-state region.

Thursday, August 19, 2010

It's a Cat's Life

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While visiting our son and daughter-in-law this past weekend, our daughter-in-law made some wise crack to my husband.

He looked at her and asked: "What will your cats do if they hear you start screaming?"

Her response: "Probably just look up at me and say, 'Why are you disturbing my nap?'"


(P.S. He would never do anything to harm our sweet daughter-in-law, and probably not the cats, either.)

Monday, August 16, 2010

Another Funny Road Sign

Humor Blogs

While passing through Chicago today, we noticed a road sign which read: BRIDGE REHAB.

Of course, we were travelling with traffic, too quickly to read the finer print below it. My husband thought it was a very scary thought -- like, bridges on drugs.

My piggy-back thought was wondering if they (the bridges) mess with the "Bridge May Be Icy" signs when no one's looking. Or maybe they (the bridges, again) are actually the ones who knock over those orange cone markers.

Scary!

Thursday, August 12, 2010

Turtle Joke

Humor Blogs

Because I've cleaned oil off of turtles lately, here is a turtle joke for you:

When the two birds watched the turtle repeatedly climb up a tree to the first branch and push off, wildly flapping it's webbed feet all the way down to the hard ground, the papa bird said to the mama bird, "Honey, I think it's time we tell him he's adopted."

Wednesday, August 11, 2010

A Sad Snake Riddle

Humor Blogs

I've been working cleaning animals from our local oil spill. Since we must keep quiet around the animals so they don't get stressed, laughter (especially mine, which gets a wee bit loud sometimes) is not allowed. So it's been quiet, quiet, and serious.

Here is a sad riddle for you:

Question: When is a snake slimy?

Answer: When it is caught in an oil spill. (Because, as we all know, snake skin is normally really smooth and not slimy at all -- at least if you stroke it from head to ... er... end.)

WAIT A MINUTE! That wasn't clean humor, that was dirty humor.

(I promise when I can laugh out loud again, I'll start re-posting.)

Monday, August 9, 2010

Number Joke in Honor of Today -- 8-9-10

Humor Blogs

Today is August 8th, 2010. In honor of 8-9-10, here is a number joke for you all:

Question: Why was 6 afraid of 7?

Answer: Because 7 8 9.

(scary)